What I want to talk about today is depression. Now often when people got the doctors what they’re told is that the reason for depression is because we’ve got a chemical imbalance.
So i guess you’re wondering how to get rid of trauma. What I want to talk to you about today is trauma. Trauma is that whenever we have any traumatic experience, generally what happens is, our mind remembers a snapshot of that event. It then reminds of the feeling whenever anything similar occurs.
How does trauma start?
So that whenever you think about the traumatic event, you always get almost like this little window of this is what happened. And the reason why your mind does that is to try to protect you.
When it doesn’t show you though is the events before the traumatic event happened or afterwards when you actually survived it, and got on with life. So whenever you are struggling with something like PTSD or trauma, whenever you think about those things, your mind is constantly giving you those snapshots, and they are the ones that have the most emotional charge connected to them.
So that whenever you think about them, you’re always getting almost like a charge of electricity. It’s where your body is literally giving you an electrical style sensation. So the problem with that is that it’s, it seems to be almost like a permanent loop.
The memory of trauma creates the emotions
So if you think about it, you feel it, you think about it, you feel it. The more that you think about it the more you feel it, and it can actually get into a habit, a habit of thinking and feeling that for most of the day, which is why trauma affects so many people these days.
So the traditional method is to have counselling, or CBT therapy where counselling what you would do is every week you would talk to someone about that traumatic event. You then go through it and in some cases, relive it with the idea that you would resolve it somehow, by re experiencing that and talking about it.
Unfortunately, in my experience that is not the case at all. Many of my clients who come to see me to see how to get rid of trauma have actually been traumatised and made even worse, through going through such a procedure like that. What tends to happen is though, through analysis and going through with different therapies and remembering it all. You end up starting to bring new memories to the forefront memories that your mind even put to the back.
So now you’ve got even more negative memories that are coming to the forefront of your mind. So, there is a much more modern way that we can deal with trauma, and negative memories. The modern approach is that we’re able to now remove the feeling from negative memories.
Now, it happens one or two ways. One is that when you come to think about the old memory, you simply won’t be able to, you just, your brain will just not be able to remember what happened, or you will be able to think about it, but you actually won’t be able to bring back that old feeling. And the more you try to bring it back, the more impossible it becomes.
So, let me ask you a question. Which one, which method sounds the best reliving old memories? Feeling how you felt, week after week, or actually just removing that feeling? So you can actually now remember how it was rather than how it felt.
Because the moment you start to associate feelings and with memories, your ability to logically think things through becomes very very difficult. So that’s what we do with modern trauma therapy techniques.
How to get rid of trauma
Today, we are, we don’t have to relive them, we can remove feelings, so that you’re able to move on with your life. Get over your life, put it behind you, and just get on with things. So if that makes sense and if that sounds good. You can always get a little chat with me booked in. Also check out the services page for more info.
One of the questions I get asked all the time is, can you make yourself ill by thinking about illnesses? Can you literally think yourself ill? The answer is absolutely yes. Let’s look at one of the most common things that people come and see me about these days, which is health anxiety.
Health anxiety traits
Quite often, a person will think and think so much about illnesses that they will actually make themselves ill. They will actually develop symptoms through the very fact that creating them through their own imagination.
And when you think about negative thoughts. What you’re going to get your body to do is send through some very nasty chemicals that will start to affect you.
Those chemicals, cortisol and adrenaline. If they’re getting pumped in every day for hours and hours every day for absolutely no reason, they will start to manifest themselves as an illness.
What physical symptoms can you get?
You certainly can get bodily illnesses such as acid reflux, problems with your bowels, problems with the way your heart feels, tightness of the chest, you name it. And if you don’t stop that process, you will make yourself ill.
It’s almost like the self fulfilling prophecy where you think you’re going to be ill, and you think you could be, and you’re actually making yourself ill. So you’re out your mind is a very powerful thing. So, what you think about is asking your mind to create.
You’ve got to be careful what you think about. If you’re constantly thinking about your chest all the time, asking yourself “How does my chest feel, does it feel tight”? You’re actually asking your mind, to give you a tight chest. Every time that you think about dying or being ill, you get more and more adrenaline sent into the body that’s gonna make you feel ill.
So the short answer is yes you can make yourself ill, through thinking about it. So, what you do instead. Well, it is a fairly complex treatment to try to reverse on your own but it can be, quite easily reversed with the right guidance.
I see a lot of people with health anxiety, probably about 50% of the clients at the moment with health anxiety. Some can develop mysterious lumps that seem to develop some of them can’t swallow.
Some of them get feelings in the body and they’re convinced it’s cancer or a heart attack or something else. Some get tingling in hands and feet, and, and all of it it’s just because they’re focusing on it. They’re actually thinking that you’ve got it and they’re asking their mind to create some sort of a sensation.
It is something that you need to get a handle on, because you can make yourself ill through that physically through that process. So if you need any help, get in touch below and we’ll have a little chat. Alternatively go straight to the services page to read more on how my anxiety program works.
Negative thoughts create self fulfilling prophecies. That was a Facebook post I posted recently but what does it really mean? It means that what you think about negatively, is actually creating it in the future. So you definitely need to stop negative thoughts from becoming a part of your thinking.
Why you need to stop thinking so negatively
So, by the very fact that you’re thinking about what you don’t want, you’re actually asking your mind to create it. Whether it be an argument, whether it be a problem at work, whether it be a problem at home, whatever it is.
What you think about is going to manifest it or a version of it. So it could be something as simple as thinking I’ve got a train journey and I really don’t want to feel anxious on that train. And then what you do is you start imagining how you would feel, and the events that could happen.
How anxiety starts
Let’s imagine you’ve got that train journey weekend ahead. And what you’re thinking about is, every day, being anxious on that train. What you’re actually doing is rehearsing, to be anxious. And there’s a very high probability that when you get there that that will be the case, then you start thinking the trains the problem!
The train isn’t the problem. It’s the fact that without realising it, you’ve been rehearsing anxiety. You’ve been rehearsing having panic attacks or whatever it is that you do. So your negative thoughts then become that self fulfilling prophecy.
The solution to negative thoughts
So, we have to be very careful what we think about, because without realising it people are rehearsing their next problem. You must stop negative thoughts before they get a grip. And it seems so innocent, doesn’t it. Think about what you don’t want because you think surely, by thinking about what I don’t want, I’m going to prevent it, or at very least, I’ll be better prepared for it.
So what you need to do instead is think about what outcome, do I want on that train, on that job interview, in that personal thing that is going on in your life. What is the outcome that I do want, and actually start mentally rehearsing, that outcome instead.
Hope that makes sense why you must stop negative thoughts. If you want more personal assistance with this you can book in a chat with me below.
Do you have an addictive personality? Do all the things that you do, have to be in excess? Do you drink to excess, drugs to excess gamble to excess is everything that you do in your life, excessive? If so, you probably think you’ve got an addictive personality.
The truth about addictive personalities
The funny thing is whenever people ring me up and tell me that they’ve got an addictive personality, 95% of them are men. Why is that? Well, men often believe they’ve got addictive personalities that means they can’t control their urges.
The question is, do they really have an addictive personality, or do they have too much money? Do they have too much money in their pockets, because I’ll guarantee, whenever people tell me they’ve got an addictive personality they earn very good money.
Addictive personality – Too much money, too much free time?
And they squander the waste all the time. But what they say to themselves is “well it’s just me, it’s just my personality”. The Truth About addictive personality is that if you believe you genuinely do have one, you will be here if that were you, your actions will be governed by that belief that that’s who you are, and that’s what you’ll experience.
And if you continue to believe you’ve got an addictive personality, one that you can’t control what you do, guess what you’re going to do more of it. I honestly believe the real reason why people believe they’ve got issues is because of the belief itself.
The power of belief
The most powerful thing in the world that we have as human beings is the power of our own beliefs, and the belief that our personalities are something that’s stuck in our DNA.
If you really believe that, you will live your life like that. So instead, I want you to believe that you don’t have an addictive personality. It’s just that in the past you’ve made some very very bad choices, and you haven’t learned from them. So use that instead.
Because if you believe you’ve got an addictive personality, you’re always going to be making bad choices bad mistakes and you’re going to need to do bad things in life. But what you’ve really got to do is actually take responsibility for your behaviour for how you behave. Also the actions and choices that you make.
Change the thought pattern
And that is the very very first step of actually breaking that fault cycle. So use this information, and start to talk to yourself differently starting to tell yourself that you don’t have addictive personality at all.
In fact, all you’ve got is a past where you’ve made some bad choices. Instead tell yourself that you’ve got a strong personality, that you’ve got a lot of willpower that you’ve got a lot of common sense. Start to tell yourself that every day.
You will literally remove this, this false belief that you’ve got this personality type. If you really genuinely have an addictive personality well you’ll be addicted to everything. It’s funny how people have in the car that it tends to be the usual three things up they’re addicted to, alcohol, drugs, or gambling.
In reality, sometime we just need to grow up and take responsibility. So I hope that makes sense and maybe that resonates with you. I hope it does. If you want one to one help with this check out my 1-2-1 service HERE